To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and
point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They
Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone
has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks Write ' For Marijuana.
6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks
you get.
7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious
face.
8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
9. Sing Along At The Opera.
10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend
Their Party Because You have a headache.
11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ' I Won! I
Won!'
12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking
lot, Yelling.... 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are
Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
14. YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE OR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO
THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and
point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They
Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone
has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks Write ' For Marijuana.
6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks
you get.
7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious
face.
8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
9. Sing Along At The Opera.
10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend
Their Party Because You have a headache.
11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ' I Won! I
Won!'
12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking
lot, Yelling.... 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are
Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
14. YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE OR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO
THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.