Banned from Wal-mart



    Banned from Wal-mart

    Post by Guest on Tue Feb 24, 2009 7:37 pm

    This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

    After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
    Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and
    preferred to get in and get out.

    Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she love to browse.
    Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local

    Dear Mrs. Samsel,

    Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
    commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been
    forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
    Samsel are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
    carts when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute

    3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
    women's restroom.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
    'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away. '

    5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on

    6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

    7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
    shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets
    from the bedding department.

    8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him, he began crying
    and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

    9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
    mirror while he picked his nose.

    10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
    asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

    11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming
    the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

    12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look'
    by using different sizes of funnels.

    13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
    yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

    14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
    assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

    And last, but not least .

    15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
    then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'

    Number of posts : 198
    Age : 49
    Location : Ontario, Canada
    Registration date : 2009-02-01

    Re: Banned from Wal-mart

    Post by Frsingsalot on Wed Feb 25, 2009 1:34 am

    Tears are streeming down my face!! Where do you come up with this stuff wild?? OMG this is so hilarious!! lol!
    Val flower


    Re: Banned from Wal-mart

    Post by Guest on Wed Feb 25, 2009 3:09 pm

    If i told you where i get this stuff then i would have to kill you lol! then ya couldnt laugh any more hehehehe

    Number of posts : 104
    Age : 58
    Location : Kentucky, USA
    Registration date : 2009-02-01

    Oh it hurts it hurts!

    Post by mikyleange on Fri Mar 06, 2009 1:22 pm

    My sides are killing me from laughing so hard!

    Laughing Laughing Laughing

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    Re: Banned from Wal-mart

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