Application for Permission to Date My Daughter

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    biggerstick2
    Admin

    Number of posts : 28
    Age : 58
    Location : Orlando Fl
    Registration date : 2009-02-03

    Application for Permission to Date My Daughter

    Post by biggerstick2 on Thu Mar 05, 2009 3:05 am

    NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,current medical report from your doctor and personal reccomendation from your clergy.

    NAME______________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

    HEIGHT_______ WEIGHT________ IQ______ GPA_________

    SOCIAL SECURITY #___________ DRIVERS LICENSE #__________

    BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES__________________________________________

    HOME ADDRESS____________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

    Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
    Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
    If No, explain:
    _____________________________________________________________
    _____________________________________________________________________

    Number of years they have been married ______________________

    If less than your age, explain
    ____________________________________________________________________
    ____________________________________________________________________

    ACCESSORIES SECTION:

    A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No
    B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No
    C. A waterbed? __Yes __No
    D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No
    E. A tattoo? __Yes __No
    F. Do you have an earring, nose ring,
    pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? __Yes __No

    (IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)

    ESSAY SECTION:

    In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?

    ______________________________________________________________
    ______________________________________________________________

    In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?
    ______________________________________________________________
    ______________________________________________________________

    In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?
    ______________________________________________________________
    ______________________________________________________________

    REFERENCES SECTION:

    Church you attend
    ___________________________________________________

    How often you attend
    ________________________________________________
    When would be the best time to interview your:
    father? _____________
    mother? _____________
    pastor? _____________


    SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

    Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential.
    A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:
    ____________________________________________________
    B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:
    ____________________________________________________

    C: A woman's place is in the:
    ____________________________________________________

    D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:
    ____________________________________________________

    E. What do you want to do IF you grow up?
    ______________________________________________________________
    ______________________________________________________________
    F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:
    ____________________________________________________
    G. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________


    I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.

    _________________________________________________________
    Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


    _____________________ _____________________
    Mother's Signature Father's Signature
    ____________________ _____________________
    Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

    Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.

    You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)
    To prepare yourself, start studying 10 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter.
    avatar
    Frsingsalot

    Number of posts : 198
    Age : 48
    Location : Ontario, Canada
    Registration date : 2009-02-01

    Re: Application for Permission to Date My Daughter

    Post by Frsingsalot on Fri Mar 06, 2009 3:44 am

    Printed and sent to my brother for all my nieces!! Hilarious!
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    mikyleange
    Admin

    Number of posts : 104
    Age : 58
    Location : Kentucky, USA
    Registration date : 2009-02-01

    ROFLMAO!!! I LOVE THIS!

    Post by mikyleange on Fri Mar 06, 2009 1:08 pm

    Thank you Bigger..!! I love this !! I'm forwarding it to my daughter, her bf, my hubs and my brothers for use with my nieces!

    Hysterical!

    Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil

    Guest
    Guest

    Re: Application for Permission to Date My Daughter

    Post by Guest on Mon Mar 16, 2009 4:39 am

    Maybe I should print this out for my son as
    a "Fair Warning"...LOL Laughing

    Guest
    Guest

    Re: Application for Permission to Date My Daughter

    Post by Guest on Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:05 am

    rofl!! As I have two lovely teenage daughters, i can see this form coming in very handy...printing out a whole stack of them in readiness right now! Wink
    trina


    Last edited by treemaid on Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:06 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : typo)

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